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Coming Out Stories Gallery - Beth

Well I'm a Transexual(still pre-hormones but close) I am 18 and started coming out 2 years ago but I'm still kinda working at it.

There is no time that I remember first feeling that I was meant to be female but half of my early memories seem to relate to it in some way.

It wasn't untill I was 15 that I stumbled across a web page dealing with the subject and my mind just went "Click - Well that makes sence" I dont remember having to strugle with it too much, it just seemed right.

Of course it took me a year to work up the courage to tell anyone. The following year I told one friend, they took it well, so I told another, and another. Over that year most of my friends were told, Including my Girlfriend at the time. She took it as well as can be expected for someone who thought they were going out with a guy. We broke up eventually over something unrelated but she became the moste helpfull person with this stuff.

Anyway when I started at uni I decided that any friends would be told as soon as possible to save complications later, They are fine with it, well most of them, one is a very traditional christian and he seems uncomfortable with the concept but he tolerates me.

The hardest steps(so far) in my coming out came that year. Firstly was seeing the counsellor at my uni, I dont know why I was so terrified of this but it took me three tries to get through the door to make an appointment. On one of the failed attempts I walked straight at the door then almost unconsiously made a 90 degree turn to the right and ran as far away from any people as I could get. Well I finally got in and it turned out that there was a counsellor who had delt with this many times before. So she has helped me to get the loose ends figued out and helped me decide what actions to take and how to take them. That year I also told my parents. In some ways they were easier to tell than other parents might be but in other ways they were harder. They don't have strong religious convictions and wouln't let themselves do anything that would have them looked upon negatively by society so I knew that they wouldn't do anything too negative but our family had developed to be rather uncommunicative so it was hard to talk to them about anything and this was a pretty big thing. Plus when Dad dissagrees with something he tends the mock it rather stongly and make you feel that you are an idiot for thinking it. Well I told my Mum first, she was somewhere between denial and wanting to stop the problem now before I do anything stupid. She gave me all these reasons why I was not right about it, how she had seen no evidence of it before I brought it up. She also wanted me to tell dad straight away. I dont know for sure but from the way she deals with most problems I believe that this was because she wanted Dad to come in and make the problem go away. Anyway,

I was still terrified of telling Dad but now I had the pressure from mum so I told him rather abruptly one day and then avoided him. Dad's responce was swift, I was sent to a Child psychiatrist who didn't have a clue.

I got things back under control by dragging my parents in to see the counsellor. So now they dont like it but they are being supportive.

My parents want to keep it a secret from the rest of the family, (brother, sister, cousins, grandparents etc.) still and I'm not quite comfortable with that because hiding it is like saying it is wrong and something to be ashamed of.

I still have some friends who don't know. Mostly because They would think that I was joking, and of them I have told some and they did think it was a joke. I am sure they can deal with it but I'm also afraid that it will make me different from them and not quite fit in with that group anymore. for one thing they are all male. They will know eventually when I figure out how to tell them and most of the big hurdles in coming out are over now.

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